Good weekend! Busy, but good.

Busy week ahead, too ...

Today: Former SIL and Little Miss High Maintenance stopping by this morning to say good-bye before moving to Oregon; I've got all three kids, and I'm picking the Munchkin up from school so she can ride.

Tomorrow: Not sure how many kids I've got - at least Copper Top - and need to take the Munchkin to get her formal fitted so it's done by this weekend.

Wednesday: Twelve o'clock interview, babysitting(however that'll work out!), riding in the evening.

Thursday: Kiraz and I are going up to test-ride Chantilly in Bethlehem (Georgia, not Pennsylvania or Israel).

Friday: Three kids, hopefully rejoicing because I've gotten the Parish Administrator job.

Saturday: Munchkin working in the AM, Kat's party in the evening.

Sunday: Hopefully taking the Munchkin up to test-ride Ace and Zoe.

I get tired just reviewing the list. Is it any wonder, [info]nieriel_raina, that I haven't finished Ch. 31 yet? And the work I did last night got erased when my computer decided to randomly re-start ... should've hit save button, should've hit save button, should've hit save button, should've hit save button, should've hit save button, should've hit save button, should've hit save button!

For Dragon*Con, I need:
* black-and-red tights
* a Cleopatra wig
I've already bought the cheap coffee maker, woot! [info]arymetore and [info]witchcat, are we going to Evening at Bree? 'Cause I need my big cooler to put our food in, and my gold overdress!

Okay, time for more coffee. Start your engines, everyone! And for those of you who missed watching the news, here's a treat to start your day:

Oooh. I'm too old for this.

We met up with ADF at Medieval Times last night - fourteen of us in all. (I felt sorriest for Red and Tony, the only men there - they wanted to go to Bass Pro Shops, but nooooo .... ) Seven teenaged girls, all of them very attractive and dressed to the nines, and seven very tired adults! They changed the "show" a little - the knight we had last year, the Yellow Knight, was the Green Knight (bad guy) this year, and is still every bit as good a rider as he was before! Our knight, the Black and White Knight, was very short, but a good fighter and a good rider. All the girls were ga-ga over the knights, and Mo spoke to some of the better riders and exchanged emails with them. One of them even promised to come to the October show ... we'll see!

The Munchkin, Barn Hobbit, and I were so wound up that we didn't get to bed 'til three! Nine a.m. came waaaaaaay too early this morning ... I made them waffles for breakfast, and Kiraz just picked up her charge. We'll be meeting the Usual Suspects at Jason's Deli for lunch today. For our Sunday lunches with the Little Miss and Nesterino, Jason's has the perfect pair of attributes:

1. It's got food they'll eat.
2. It's already noisy.

I'm still having Lunch Wars with Copper Top. I know it's a control issue with him; his mother spends three hours making him the center of attention every evening at the dinner table, and he wants the same from me. Well, he's not gonna get it. He doesn't want to eat? Fine, he can get down. He won't starve.

Slogging my way through Microsoft Office 2007 - hopefully I can get myself certified before I even start taking courses! Dad talked to one of his fellow profs, and he thinks I should go into Web Design. Any opinions? Yes/no/maybe? I'd like to start school as soon as possible, so I can move forward with some sort of career that doesn't involve diapers or screaming toddlers.

I got an email from GypsyLady. Our hats will ship Monday! Woots all round!

We had a message on the answering machine last night from a real estate agent, saying she'd be bringing someone by to see the house between 11 - 2 Saturday. So this morning I got the Munchkin to Kiraz's to bring up to the barn, and spent three hours mopping, vacuuming, and straightening up. Then I showered, changed, and went to do some errands, coming back around one. They had not been. I waited until around two, then decided they simply weren't coming, and ran off to Costco.

Well, guess what? They're here.

Anyway. Always like having a gay couple look at the house. Just so long as they BUY IT.

I bought two cute little mini-toppers from GypsyLadyHats on Etsy for Dragon*Con, on Kiraz's recommendation (Barn Hobbit is going as Goth Alice in Wonderland, and needed a Mad Hatter topper). I got a black and red one with an embroidered dragon, and the Munchkin got a true mini, gold lame with a black brim. I'm planning to wear mine with my black satin skirt, red corset, and shoulder-length black satin gloves. And Monday, I'll wear the cute little goth-girl dress with a red half-corset, red and black striped stockings, black mary janes, and the hat! (I'd post pictures, but the seller's already taken the photos of our merchandise down - how's that for service!) Now all I need is one of those super-gorgeous black leather collars I saw in the dealer's rooms last year - and someone to fork over the $180 for a really, really nice one.

I need a sugar daddy. Or a job.

Well, we're leaving in an hour or so to pick up Kiraz and Barn Hobbit, and then we're going to meet Mo, Tess, and a bunch of other ADF people at Medieval Times for Kate's going-away party. (I still can't believe she's moving away!) I figured, since Kiraz drove the Munchkin to and from Beaver Spring today, I'd do the driving - this way I'm the Designated Driver, and she's the Designated Drinker, which, after the week she's had, suits her just fine.

Let's see ... there was something else I was going to say ... oh well, lost it.

I hate being here when people look at the house ... I always want to apologize for it! What I really want to do is put my satin skirt and red corset on - I haven't put them on in tandem yet, and I want to see how they look together!

Well, in accordance with our real estate agent's suggestion, I have done something that I would not normally do ... something that I avoid religiously ... an activity that I am no good at, do not enjoy, does not interest me, and find futile.

Yes ... that's right ... I planted flowers.



Black-eyed Susans and begonias. Whee.

Also, here's a picture of Pippin and his tumor.



I suppose I could post pics of the Kentucky Faire ... meh, let me futz around with them first. I need a more current copy of Picture!It. And a newer camera. Anyone got a spare $1000?

On the fire for tonight: NOTHING. Deal with it!

Copper Top's mom is going to pick him up early tomorrow, so I can get to TN even earlier than I'd planned! Thank you, CTMom!

This morning, I slept until eight. It felt wonderful.

Straw was an angel last night!



It was oppressively hot and humid yesterday; when I got to the barn, all the horses were snoozing in their stalls. But when Straw saw me walk up to her stall, she turned, pricked her ears, and came right to me! Understand this mare is normally very aloof - a good ride, but not very affectionate. Considering I'm still a very marginal rider, I was tickled pink.

She gave me a beautiful ride - I'm working on my seat, and on keeping my hands and legs quiet; she seemed to appreciate it! By the time the lesson was over, I was bending her at a jog with split reins in one hand. Not too bad, considering Zip was getting all Attitudinal in the arena with us. And when I finished untacking and grooming her, and was giving her treats, she was so sweet, lipping at my hands and nickering to me.

Jaxx had better watch out ... Straw might edge him aside as Oropher's favorite lesson horse!



Now, I have a conundrum. Don't any of you mention this to the Munchkin; I don't want to get her hopes up, only to have them dashed.

Tan's neighbor Lore has a beautiful grey AQHA mare named Chantilly for sale. Affordable, well-trained, good personality. Mo said if they had the acreage she would buy Tilly in a heart beat (a high recommendation, as Mo has atmospheric standards for horses.) Mom earmarked some moolah for her grandbaby to purchase a horse for said grandbaby's birthday, which is coming up in September. But, as those of you who know anything about horses know, it's not the purchase of the horse that costs the most; it's the maintenance - board, vet, farrier, etc.

Do I even have the right - economically speaking - to be thinking about this right now?!

But she is a beautiful horse ... and the Munchkin has met her, and adores her ...

Oooooohhhhhh, I need a sugar daddy!

Anyway. On the fire for today:

* Grocery store, to buy lasagne fixin's (and cat food)
* Oil change/check-over for the van, maybe even have it OMG CLEANED!!!!
* Home to make lasagne, do laundry
* Pack! How many Faire outfits do I need, witchcat07
* Dinner at 's!!! I get to meet the baby!!!

As they said at the end of Hooway for Wodney Wat, "woot woot, wooty toot toot."

I'm not sure what it is ... the past few days I've been afflicted with heavy-feeling headaches, and lethargy. My blood pressure got VERY low yesterday, so I've cut back to half a Lisinopril. But I don't seem to want to do anything ... very unlike the "Jackrabbit," eh?

Got my D*C book in the mail! I'm very excited about seeing Patrick Stewart (sexiest bald man EVAH), Tom Felton, John Noble, and of course Leonard Nimoy. I'm also contemplating funking up my hair for the weekend. I dug out my trusty old box-O-goodies that I used when the Munchkin was pinkified, and I've got:

* Two mixing bowls
* Four sets gloves
* Four applicators (three large and one small)
* Two hair clips
* Half a roll of hair coloring foil
* Two boxes black hair dye
* One box Light Reddish Blonde
* One box Red Penny
* One frost kit, color Champagne
* One box blonding kit
* Half a bottle of creme developer
* Two bottles of Special Effects Atomic Pink
* Two bottles of Adore Violet Gem
* One bottle of Adore Indigo blue
* One bottle of Adore Rich Fuchsia
* One bottle of Jazzing Mood Indigo
* One bottle of Avatar Crystal Clear
* One bottle White Out conditioning toner

The question is: WHAT do I do with it???

[info]susubug, last night was so much fun! Thank you for coming over and giving me a reason to cook! Even though I didn't score any lobster, the langoustine risotto was quite edible, and of course my mother's tomatoes were superb. Best of all, though, was the company and conversation; you are such a fun person to know. You give me hope that I'm gonna survive this divorce after all!

I got my order from Penzey's last week, and decided to christen my Cassia Cinnamon and China Ginger by trying their recipe for ginger snaps. The dough is currently chillaxin' in my fridge; I'll let you know how they turn out.

Speaking of the refrigerator, did you know that all the cold air that circulates through the fridge portion comes from the freezer? And that the fan is what circulates the cold air? And if your freezer is turned down too low, your fridge's ambient temperature remains higher? And that it takes 24 hours for a fridge to cool to a safe temperature (below 40 degrees)? I didn't - but I do now. And in case anyone who lives in the north Atlanta area was wondering, yes, Castleberry's is THE place to go for appliance repair.

So, now I've got Nesterino and Copper Top playing nicely, my kitchen clean, my bunny shedding, and I can't remember whether or not I took my Lisinopril this morning ... the headache I am currently experiencing might be an indicator that no, I have not. Think I'll dig up my monitor and check.

EDIT:
107/77. Think I'll take some aspirin.

I did it! I bought tickets to Colin & Brad!

Mo said we can leave early if we have to - by the end of the day, the judge should be about finished, anyway, and someone else can step in to be ring steward. We'll just have to be careful about choosing the Munchkin's classes to make sure she doesn't have any late ones ... maybe pull her out of the Western divisions altogether.

But still, woots! Very much looking forward to it.

No Copper Top today; just Nesterino, who's napping. After he gets up and I give him some lunch, we'll head over to the MIL's to root through some of the Munchkin's stuff in the attic. Oh, joy ... hope I find it quickly, or we're gonna melt! Maybe I'll just chuck some of the boxes in the van and bring 'em home.

I want ... a pizza.

Oh! And I had another WLIIA dream last night - Colin and Jeff were in a CSI franchise spin-off, and Colin was playing the rude, hard-bitten police lieutenant and Jeff was the slick and condescending DA. I'd pay to see that!

Okay, a quick post while the Munchkin is in the shower ...

sesshoumaru2004 has finished fixing up my notebook! I can't wait to get it back and start playing with it. Hooray for uber-geeks! So to reward him (in part) for his labor, on Sunday we shall have lamb vindaloo, chicken tandoori, basmati rice, palak paneer, green bean and tomato biryani, and homemade garlic naan.

Further food porn: Tomorrow night is show prep at ADF, but because only three members of the show team are going, it's not going to be nearly as much work. So today I made four from-scratch pizzas to bring up and cook there for everyone - cheese, pepperoni, onion and bell pepper, and mushroom and olive. I've stuck them in the freezer so they'll be fresh and ready to bake when we get to Mo's!

Tonight I'm hosting the bellydance DVD viewing party - I'm making warnerharmer's famous artichoke dip, and have soda, oreos, Doritos, and Twizzlers. And wine. Which I think I shall perform some QC on right now. Hm, white or red ... ?

Oh yeah, and I got my hair cut today. I look FABULOUS!!!! And you know what? I haven't seen Angel in about a year and a half, since I got my wedge cut; I walked in, her eyes popped open, and she exclaimed, "You look wonderful!" Let's see; I gained 15 lbs, but lost about 180 lbs of stress ... best diet I ever went on. She was shocked that I hadn't found someone new; she said the healthy, happy glow I emanated MUST be related to a wonderful new man. Um, no ... not yet, anyway. Technically I'm still married ... but by Dragon*Con? Game on, peeps.

Heh.

Star Trek Wootage

Yeah, OK, so I'm a Trekkie. So sue me.

No, I'm not hardcore. I can't give you episode names and numbers, nor do I know Dr. McCoy's serial number. I admit I've entered into the Kirk vs Picard debate (Kirk would win the battle, but Picard would win the war); I've read numerous books, and when I was twelve wrote a really horribly embarrassing Mary Sue. I freaked out over the opportunity to meet Nichelle Nichols (remember, Wdnsdyschld?) and gushed all over poor Walter Koenig when I shook his hand. I own a first edition Starship Enterprise collectible Christmas ornament and a Lt. Uhura dress, and am totally pumped that Esmeray is going to enter the Miss Klingon Empire competition this year.

Yeah, I've seen the movie twice, and am planning to see it a third time with Arizonakelly and Suz.

Yeah, the Munchkin and I stopped at Burger King specifically Friday night to get a couple of ST glasses. And took them home and gloated over them and washed them and put them lovingly in the cabinet.

And yes, I made a special trip to Burger King yesterday while my van was getting cleaned to pick up the last two glasses.

And yes, I admit it ... I was so disappointed over them being out of Spock glasses that I girded up my loins, put on my best friendly and flirty face, got nicely pushy, and arranged with the restaurant manager to buy the glass from the display case when the promo is over Monday morning.

I even gave him my phone number.

Okay. Maybe I am hardcore.

And, two of my fave-raves, combined!

I GOT 'EM BACK!!!!



woo hoo!

Memorial Day, 2009 Monday, May, 25, 2009
by John Fischer

War is hell.

There's no way around this. It has always been this way. I used to think it was the Vietnam conflict that robbed war of its glory, but it was only the old Hollywood WWII movies that glamorized it. Steven Spielberg changed that forever in the opening scene of Saving Private Ryan—a sickeningly real depiction of the Normandy invasion at Omaha Beach that made John Wayne's movies seem like a visit to the Mickey Mouse Club set.

So this Memorial Day, I'm thinking not of the great heroes who accomplished our freedom, but of the young kid in the front row of an amphibious transport vehicle who took the first round of enemy fire in his chest before he ever got to even leave the boat or shoot his rifle. And I'm thinking of the 5,000 other men who died on the beach that day, June 6, 1944, and what they died for. I'm thinking of the senselessness of it all—a young man's noble send-off, his training, his prayers, his shaky fingers around his last smoke after throwing up on the boat (was he seasick or just scared?), the front of the boat falling away, and the first bullet ending his all-too-short story. I'm thinking of his mom and dad sitting home in perhaps another Omaha (not the beach), listening to the news and wondering how their dear Billy is doing over there.

How many times has this played itself out in just the brief history of America? And how many ways do we try and live with this? The ones who come back don't want the attention. They already feel guilty that they came back and their buddies didn't. That's why we honor the buddies today.

But how do you memorialize so many who died such horrible deaths for reasons that often amount to nothing more than the pride and arrogance of a few powerful men? You try and remember why they did it.

I'm thinking of my own peers who died in a war no one understood by reason of the number on their draft card. My name could just as easily be on that granite wall in Washington, but for a student ministerial deferment. They died for their country at a time when many in their country were spitting on their graves.

They didn't deserve that. They were not warmongers. They were just doing their duty. Their number was up. They were high school football players and neighborhood cut-ups that answered the call. They did what a nation asked them to do, even when they didn't know why. They took the bullet for everyone who didn't go, and like Able, their blood cries out from the ground.

Normandy's beaches are quiet now. Children laugh and play in the sand. Warm breezes blow. The sea has swallowed up its dead long ago, and the sands have washed away the memory, except for today. Today we try to remember.

War is hell and has taken way too many young men and women in the prime of their life. We pray that in God's mercy, heaven has them now.

I miss you, Grampa. And I wish I'd had the chance to talk to you about your service in the Pacific. I hope where you've ended up now helps you forget the hell of it all.

Well, today's the day ... yet another check-mark in my bizarre and stressful calendar for the past couple of months. At then end of the night I'll be able to add it to my list of accomplishments for the week, which already include (1)Finish Bible study facilitation for the year, (2)Help Munchkin survive ninth grade, (2)End extra dance practices on Thursday nights and Saturday mornings/afternoons. But does this mean my calendar magically empties? NO. Of course not! Trips, summer camps, riding lessons, visits ... Well, if nothing else, I'm never bored.

Now I'm going to impale marinated chicken and mushrooms on skewers. What a life I lead!

The cat is licking the desk.

o_O

On the fire for tonight: NOTHING.

Dress rehearsal went very well! Though I had a moment of panic in between completing Rhythm of the Laila and moving on to Sidi Mansour; I changed into my costume and realized I had FORGOTTEN THE DANCE. But as soon as the music started, I kicked back into gear, thank goodness! Oh, and the Special Guest Dancer is Tribal/Burlesque. This should prove interesting!

I have gotten addicted to Urban Decay makeup. Oops.

My laptop still isn't here. Darn.

The cat is now lounging against the keyboard and keeps JUg;khg,'d()_y6. Stupid cat.

I shall now watch "Whose Line" and contemplate whom I shall marry in my dream tonight. Hopefully not Kathy Kinney; that would be ... no. Just ... no.

I have very little to say, except that I got up way too early on a Saturday morning when I didn't need to.

I gate-crashed a party last night ... Warnerharmer and Big Joker were bringing the kids out for sushi to meet up with some friends for a birthday, and I hobbled along to help with the Little Miss and Nesterino (long, drawn-out grown-up dinners are not their "scene"). It was very enjoyable - the food and company were good, and it was nice being out and not a "mom" for a change.

Yeah, yeah, I know; in three years she'll be out of the house and I'll be hugging White Bunny and sobbing, "Where did my baby go?!" Maybe by then I'll have picked up a rich sugar daddy who will whisk me off to Italy after her graduation and spend his time lavishing me with gifts and gelato while we stroll down the Spanish Steps. Riiiiiiiight ... if Hypothetical Sugar Daddy only takes me to Rome, he is in so much trouble. And if HSD even suggests Pisa, I'm stealing his vintage 1947 MG TC Roadster and running off with the pool boy.

Has anyone ever heard the band Fair to Midland? The Munchkin got me on to them - kind of remind me of Asia, with a little dark metal thrown in there. Me likees. I also want to gank the new Dashboard Confessional. Oooh, I'm so EMO!!!! (dyes and spikes hair while wearing raccoon eye makeup and skinny jeans that make butt look like an ice cream cone)

I need a bigger iPod ... Barn Hobbit got a purple 8gb. I have iPod envy.

OK, I need to start chopping chicken and veggies for the soulvaki ... and putting more insta-tan on my bod. I hate the way this stuff smells!

I had another married-to-Colin dream last night. I can understand my dreaming about the WLiiA guys, but Colin? Why can't my subconscious pair me with one of the cute ones, like Chip or Jeff?

A friend at church, who's been divorced for about 10 years, told me at the beginning of this process that she called her divorce experience "the summer of the dog." Apparently in the middle of it all, she processed and settled herself by sitting in her back yard with gin-and-tonics and cigarettes, throwing the ball for her dog over and over. I shall call this past year "the year of Whose Line." When I'm overwhelmed, scared, sad, angry, whatever, I go to YouTube, search for WLiiA stuff, and just turn my brain off. I don't know if it helps or not, but it sure gives me interesting matrimonial dreams.

I had the Little Miss, Nesterino, and Copper Top this morning. What chaos! But it was kind of fun, too ...a four-year-old girl, a two-year old boy and a one-year-old boy. And I might get another part-time two-year-old next week! CT's mom's sister has a couple of coworkers who need childcare for their son a few days a week, and Jan gave me a glowing recommendation.

Copper Top is getting really cute. He calls me Oropher House, calls anything he might run into a "bonkyourhead," and says "bless you, Oropher House!" whenever I sneeze or cough. He and the Little Miss played "nap" today - got out a blanket and all the pillows, lay down for thirty seconds, then informed me they didn't have to nap this afternoon because they'd already taken care of it. Riiiight ...

So, [info]warnerharmer took her kiddos home, I put Copper Top down, had some lunch, tried to catch up on Facebook (a futile task), and cleaned the kitchen and downstairs bathroom. I have a headache - I can't decide if it's lack-of-caffeine, front-moving-through, or just the aftereffects of having three children under the age of five in my living room for four hours.

Just sitting here, I have seen brown thrashers, a red-throated sapsucker, blue jays, male and female cardinals, a male bluebird (gorgeous!), one of the nesting pairs of rufus-sided towhees, a tufted titmouse (go ahead and giggle; I always do), and a zillion squirrels, cursing me for using a squirrel-proof feeder. But they're feasting on stale bread and eyeing my cat cautiously, so I'm not overly concerned.

Tomorrow, I bring the Munchkin up to the barn to do stalls, then it's off to Nicola's for our staging at eleven. That will probably take most of the day! Home, fix the soulvaki, sleep, up, church, soulvaki at Warnerharmer's, and then ... the Spring Shimmy! I'm so nervous. I simply can't do headslides, and the floor work is complicated by the mermaid skirts we have to wear. But the Sidi Mansour costumes are adorable! Black satin harem pants with hot pink flares, a matching tie-top, and a black coin sash!

Today is the last day of school. FINALLY. What a craptastic year. Oh, and I changed the SysAdmin name on my computer to "dorkwad." Just in case.

Don't read if you don't like bad language

I contemplated not posting the events of yesterday, but what the hell. It happened, and although it doesn't exactly show me up in the best of lights, so what? I think it's only fair. And besides, relating it is cathartic.

Night before last, I lost my temper during a snarky little email war that the Dumpster and I were having. But in October, when we had our first major, big-time blow-out, I decided I'd better put some Anger Management techniques into practice. It's not that I don't deserve to be angry; it's just that it is not wise to let one's anger control one's reactions. So I started the writing method - cranking out letters/paragraphs/emails filled with bitter, furious, sarcastic, cruel thoughts, lashing out with bad language and insults, letting all the pent-up frustration get the better of me. I wrote and saved to the Drafts folder about six or seven of these poisonous epistles, being very careful each time to save it to Drafts, and not hit "send"! Those of you who have read my fiction know I can be quite a wordsmith, and I poured a lot of my verbal talents into these vitriolic emails. Then I went to bed; the second half of the process is to go to sleep, having purged the crap; in the morning the emails are re-read, deleted, and one is then calm enough to proceed logically and gently.

Well.

I brought the Munchkin to the barn early in the morning for her dressage clinic, and my drive back was spent in prayer and contemplation how to reverse the bitter and caustic trend of our communication so that we could at least speak civilly to each other. I was getting tired of short, snippy emails, and was thinking about simply calling him and inviting him out for coffee so we could hash things out and relieve some of the awkwardness. So I was actually pleased when I pulled in the driveway and saw that he was there, getting ready to mow the lawn. I hopped out and greeted him, saying I was glad to see him; he looked at me with the hollowest, emptiest expression on his face I have seen EVER, and said:

"That was quite an email you sent me this morning. Don't worry, I'm going to just mow the lawn and then get the fuck out of your life."

I cannot describe how horrified I was by this. I knew I hadn't sent any of those emails ... I KNEW it. I had never intended to let him, or anyone else for that matter, read ANY of them. I stammered something out - that I hadn't sent them, I didn't know how it happened, he was not intended to read them - but he turned his back on me and said nothing.

I'm not even sure how I got back into the house. My knees felt like Jell-O and I could feel my blood pressure spiking (yes, on Lisinopril). I called the only person I felt would be able to understand, sympathise with both parties, and keep me from popping an artery ... [info]susubug.

Let me just tell every single one of you that she is the most impartial, funny, wise, and careful person I think I have ever met in my entire life. I postulate she might be the most impartial, funny, wise and careful person in the state of Georgia, if not the entire southeast. She took up the reins of my flat spin and controlled it, speaking soothingly to me while I checked my email. Oddly enough - and this is still kind of freaking me out - ALL THE EMAILS WERE STILL IN THE DRAFTS FOLDER. And NONE of the emails were in the Sent Folder. NONE. So I had no idea which of those caustic loads of crap he'd actually received.

I have no idea how long we were on the phone, but Susu, I owe you so big, I'll be in your debt past my death-bed and well into Purgatory - not heaven, because at the moment I'm pretty sure there's some penance to do! - so I'll polish your harp and preen your wings and give your halo a good buffing for the next millenium or so, 'kay?

I wrote him a note, apologizing for the email and trying to explain that I had never intended him to actually receive it. I also gave him the $600 I had saved to pay for half of the laptop (which was one of the original things we'd been fighting about). Then I put the note and envelope of money in his truck, and left.

I sobbed all the way to dance practice at Esmeray's house. I managed to pull myself together for the next couple of hours, but cried all the way home, too.

He was not there ... but had left a note scratched on the back of my note, saying he was sorry how things had turned out, he was glad he'd gotten to hear what was really on my mind, and he didn't want the money. The envelope was there, under a coffee mug full of four-leaf clovers. When we were dating and first married, he used to pick them for me ... he has this knack of seeing them hidden amongst all the three-leaf ones; he'd be strolling along, bend down, pick one, and give it to me with a smile.

Needless to say, I sobbed my way through my shower, too.

I picked up the Munchkin and Barn Hobbit, they got cleaned up, and I took them to the mall in Buford to shop and to see Star Trek: The IMAX Experience at the late showing. And Susubug, bless her congested heart, called just to make sure I was okay.

The Munchkin and I got our color-coordinated, matching belly button bling for the dance next weekend; both she and Barn Hobbit got new purses; I bought them funky and colorful new riding socks, and we ate gross Mall Food and saw the movie. (I loved it, but I understand why hard-core Trekkies hate it!) We learned on the way home that Barn Hobbit had NEVER SEEN A STAR TREK EPISODE OR MOVIE IN HER LIFE OMG, so while I went to bed ,they sat up and watched First Contact.

Let me just say, here and now, that the past nine months have been some of the most difficult I have ever experienced, bar none. But with friends like Susubug, I can get through this. I am so thankful for you all.

That said, here's some Food Porn.

For lunch today: Italian Wedding soup with tiny meatballs, oven-roasted baby zucchini stuffed with gorgonzola and fresh basil, and whatever else people are bringing ... I hope church runs late, as we've actually got someone coming to see the house this morning.

I am exhausted.

Having Dee's family for dinner tonight, which we've done - oh, hundreds of times in the past nine years! So I'm setting the table, and I set it for six.

It SUCKS that I'm still in the we're-a-family-of-three mode.

It's set for five now.

HoKAY.

Let's try this again, shall we?

Friday night, show prep. Everything went very well ... I think we're actually getting the hang of this! We were done at nine pm, instead of the eleven thirty pm we're used to; at one point in the evening, Mo and I looked at each other with puzzled looks on our faces and said, "What's missing here? ... oh yeah, the panic!"

Saturday's show went pretty well - there was some drama that Mo and I had to deal with, but for the most part, "them Statham girls" did very well!






We went out with Mo and her family for Mexican afterwards, and ended up sitting chewing the fat until ten. Needless to say, the Munchkin and I were pretty tired the next day!

Sunday, the Munchkin and I finally worked up our choreography. I will NEVER leave it that late again. We looked cute, and the dance was adorable, but we kept forgetting stuff!


Kiraz and Barn Hobbit, dancing to the Turtles' "Happy Together":


And us, dancing to Hellogoodbye's "Touchdown Turnaround":




We opted out of the repeated backbends, and substituted omis and maias. My hips still hurt!

Anyway. We survived ... AND I got the most AWESOME Mother's Day gifts! Little Miss gave me a portable iPod player, Mom got me riding gloves, and the Munchkin got me this:


I have the most awesome friends and family in the freaking UNIVERSE.

Okay, so Copper Top is down for a nap, and I'm waiting on Dee's BIL to bring over and hang some mirrors in the basement. I'm paying him with lasagne, salad, and brownies. A man's heart is through his stomach!

Hokay.

Yesterday was a "day off." (Right!) Though I did manage to score lunch with [info]susubug and a friend! I also made it to the farmer's market, where I dug up some fixin's for Big Joker to make coconut chicken soup for Sunday. I was having a terrible time finding kafir leaves, lemon grass, thyme, and celery ... so I figured, well, that's the breaks; if BHFM doesn't have it, chances are you don't really need it anyway ... but when I was getting nam pla in the Thai aisle, this guy with a name badge walks by and says, "Are you finding everything, ma'am?" I cheerfully told him, no, not really; he took immediate interest and said he would personally find me every item I was missing! He walked me back to the produce department, introduced me to the produce manager, and sent a bunch of guys scurrying around to get me what I wanted.

I guess it helps to have a nice rack, and look good in heels. You get such excellent customer service.

Anyway. Gotta run!

Just changed his diaper. That's what it was, all right!

Rain, rain, go away; come again ... when we're not at the barn.

On the other hand, the grass and trees are all nice 'n' green.

Got my pix from T2Digital! Now I need to pick poses and sizes ... if anyone wants to see them, let me know, and I'll email you the link.

Nesterino's still napping; Copper Top just finished lunch (acorn squash and a turkey meatball) ... he's got an, erm, interesting look on his face; I think he's "expressing himself." Better check on that!

Last night I set up the new cable box ALL BY MYSELF. Hooray for HD! And for being able to figure it out on my own. Yay!

Doop dee doop dee dooo ....

It's amazing how, when you add up the drive to Beaver Spring, the drive from ADF to BS, loading up horses, driving them back to ADF, a double hunter/jumper lesson, driving back to BS, unloading horses and tack, you're stuck at home at 4:30 still waiting for the kids to call.

On the other hand, had a chance to color my hair. It's DARK. I like it!

I went to Dekalb Co. Farmer's Market today after dance practice. That's one of the only "grocery stores" I feel comfortable shopping in, wearing my harem pants and blue caftan. No one even gave me a second look!

Tonight: Dinner with Dee! I'm bringing insalata caprese, baguettes, olives nicoise, roasted red bell pepper with garlic and basil, and wine (white and red, since I don't know what the main course is). Tomorrow, dinner here ... turkey sausage lasagne with, um, whatever and Mom decide to bring.

The Munchkin and I worked on our Mother's Day choreography last night. We've got everything pretty much hammered out, now we have to practice it. It's FAST. Why on earth did we pick an electronica song?! There's perfectly good Tarkan!

Speaking of ...



He's just too cute.

OK ... I guess I'll go do something else now ...

*phew*

Had Copper Top and Nesterino this morning; fortunately both were greatly improved over the past few days ... I refuse to make the lunch-table a battlefield. If they don't want to eat, they can get down. They won't starve. Sheesh!

Anyway ... both boys had a boatload of noodles, cheese, vegetables, fruit, Greek yogurt, oatmeal, blah blah blah, got cleaned up, played nicely together so I could get my kitchen cleaned up, and after warnerharmer picked up Nesterino, I put CT down and mopped all the floors, including the patio, which was still covered in the detritus of Tree Sex. Picked up toys ... washed dishes ... rinsed mops, put bucket away (sorry, lolrus) and am now chatting with susubug, who is clamoring for Food Porn. SO!

Last night at dinner:

Romaine salad with grated carrot and fresh tomato, fricasee of chicken breast with cream gravy and steamed parsley dumplings, sweet onion and button mushrooms fried in butter with fresh oregano and red salt. For dessert: Candy and Âya! We practiced "Rhythm of the Laila" with Kiraz and Barn Hobbit until about ten ... then the Munchkin and I drilled Mercutio's "Queen Mab" soliloquy from Romeo and Juliet, which she is presenting in front of her Lit class today. We were up until twelve thirty ... then awake at six to drill some more. I hope she got it!

Not sure what to do for dinner tonight. Maybe I should check the basement freezer ... I tend to forget what I've put down there.

When CT leaves, I'm replacing the screens on the Munchkin's and my bedroom windows. I refuse to pay $300/month to air condition the house, but we can't cool our rooms off without inviting Captain Caterpillar and his Bug Brigade. I killed a bee in my room last night. A BEE. So the screens go back on! Sorry, BP; it's not like the windows are gorgeous anyway ... adding or subtracting screenage hasn't helped or hindered the sale of the house so far.

Only one week to work up the choreography for Hellogoodbye's "Touchdown Turnaround." Yeek!

I decided to do the Munchkin a favor yesterday, and do her laundry for her. Holy crap. Four loads. She has more clothes than I do, and that's really saying something!

OK ... off to figure out what to make for dinner.

It has been exactly a year since my grandfather's memorial service/viewing ... exactly a year since Melissa called my cell to tell me Image had to be put down.

Man, that was a sucky day.

Today was not sucky. Parts of it were, I mean; no day is perfect after all. But it wound up with me learning how to properly trot, to set a horse's head in Western, to maintain the trot while changing direction. Thank goodness I don't ride English ... I'd have to learn how to POST. Getting the correct lead when I start to canter is going to be hard enough!

I LOVE RIDING. I hope I can make enough money to continue to take lessons. Barring that, I hope I can take lessons long enough to get good enough to ride on my own! I want to get the Munchkin a horse ... I want a job ... a house of my own ... a dog. A horse trailer. A double one. And a big truck. A 2500. And while I'm at it, I want a horse like Image ... a big easy keeper, plays like a three-year-old, falls asleep when he's bored, plays with buckets and does goofy stuff to make me laugh, whickers and talks to me if he knows I've got treats in my pocket.

RIP, Grampa and Image. I wish you two had met. You would've liked each other.

Copper Top's down for an early nap, and Nesterino is up. He surprised me with his first auto-pants-removing-incident, awakening in nothing but a diaper and shirt. Now it's lunchtime - Soylent Green mixed with oatmeal cereal, rice rusk, rejected carrot, enthusiastically accepted canteloupe, and organic Greek yogurt.

Oh, my life is such a grand and exciting adventure. On to wipe his face.